September Divorce Check-In: 7 Things Illinois Parents Should Review Before the Holidays
By Law Offices of Tedone & Morton, P.C.
September may seem early to start thinking about the holidays.
For divorced or separated parents, however, it is actually a good time to do a parenting plan review.
Once school begins, calendars fill up quickly. Halloween, Thanksgiving, winter break, family gatherings, holiday parties, travel, and extracurricular activities can all arrive before you know it.
If you share parenting time, September is a good opportunity to pull out your parenting plan or allocation judgment and make sure you understand what the next several months will look like.
Think of it as a September check-up for your parenting plan. A little planning now can help prevent confusion and unnecessary disagreements when the holidays arrive.
Here are seven things Illinois parents should review now.
1. Review Your Holiday Parenting Schedule
Holiday schedules can be different from your regular weekly parenting schedule.
Your allocation judgment or parenting plan may specify special holiday arrangements for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, Halloween, or school breaks.
Don’t assume your normal Wednesday or weekend schedule automatically applies during a holiday. Read the actual language of your order.
During your parenting plan review, look for:
- Which parent has the child for each holiday
- When holiday parenting time begins and ends
- Whether the holiday schedule overrides the regular schedule
- How school breaks are divided
- Pickup and drop-off locations
- Whether holidays alternate from year to year
A few minutes spent reviewing the order now can prevent a major disagreement later.
2. Check the Thanksgiving Schedule Now
Thanksgiving may still seem far away, but it will be here before you know it.
It is also one of the holidays most likely to involve travel, extended family gatherings, and changes to the normal parenting schedule.
If both parents have different ideas about when an exchange should occur, a disagreement can escalate quickly.
Review your order before making Thanksgiving plans.
If you believe the schedule is unclear, don’t wait until Thanksgiving week to try to resolve the issue. Addressing questions early gives everyone more time to make arrangements.
3. Look Ahead to Winter Break
Winter break can be much more complicated than a single holiday.
Your child’s school may be closed for one or two weeks, and your parenting plan may contain special provisions for school vacations.
Pull out the school calendar and compare it with the language in your parenting plan.
Ask:
- When does winter break officially begin?
- When does school resume?
- How is the break divided?
- Does Christmas or another holiday override the regular schedule?
- Are travel days addressed?
- Are there notice requirements for travel?
If you are planning an out-of-state or extended trip, check your parenting plan before booking anything.
This is exactly why September is a good time for a parenting plan check-up: you still have time to address questions before holiday plans are set in stone.
4. Don’t Forget About Extracurricular Activities
Fall activities don’t necessarily stop because it is a holiday.
Football games, tournaments, dance recitals, concerts, school plays, club activities, and other events may occur during either parent’s parenting time.
Parents should make reasonable efforts to coordinate these events without unnecessarily interfering with the other parent’s time.
Illinois parenting plans can address each parent’s access to school and extracurricular records, reports, and schedules.
A shared calendar can be particularly helpful.
Adding practices, games, performances, school events, and holiday plans to one calendar can make it easier for everyone to see what is coming up and avoid last-minute surprises.
5. Communicate About Travel Early
If you plan to travel with your child during your parenting time, review your parenting plan for any requirements about notice, travel, or exchanges.
Don’t wait until the week before a trip to tell the other parent about your plans.
Early communication can help avoid unnecessary disputes and allows both parents to address practical issues such as transportation and the child’s school schedule.
If your planned travel involves relocating your residence rather than simply taking a vacation, different Illinois rules may apply.
If you are considering a move, make sure you understand the applicable requirements before making plans.
6. Ask Whether Your Parenting Plan Still Works
A parenting plan that worked well a few years ago may not work as well today.
Maybe one parent moved. Maybe your child changed schools. Maybe the child is now heavily involved in sports, music, or other activities. Work schedules may have changed, too.
Your family may simply have grown into a different routine.
Illinois law allows parenting time to be modified under certain circumstances when a modification is necessary to serve the child’s best interests.
Parents may be able to reach an agreement or use mediation to resolve changes. If you cannot reach an agreement, an attorney can explain whether a formal modification may be appropriate.
You don’t necessarily need to change your parenting plan just because your family’s circumstances have changed. But September is a good time to ask the question.
Does our current parenting plan still work for our family?
7. Keep Your Child’s Needs at the Center
Holiday disputes can become emotional very quickly.
Both parents may want Thanksgiving morning. Both may want Christmas Eve. Both may want to take the child to visit grandparents or other relatives.
But the holidays are ultimately about your child—not about winning a particular block of time.
Illinois courts consider the child’s best interests when making decisions about parenting time, including factors relating to the child’s adjustment to home, school, and community.
Whenever possible, parents should focus on creating a holiday schedule that allows the child to enjoy time with both sides of the family without unnecessary conflict.
Your September Parenting Plan Check-Up
Before the holiday season arrives, take a few minutes to:
- Review your parenting plan or allocation judgment
- Check the school calendar
- Review Thanksgiving and winter-break provisions
- Put holiday exchanges on your calendar
- Discuss travel plans early
- Review extracurricular activities
- Communicate about major holiday events
- Identify any unclear provisions
- Consider whether your current parenting schedule still works for your family
Think of it as a check-up before the busy season begins. It is much easier to address a question in September than to discover a problem the week before Thanksgiving.
Don’t Wait Until Thanksgiving Week
Holiday parenting-time disputes are much easier to address when everyone has time to plan.
If you are unsure about what your Illinois parenting plan requires—or if your current arrangement no longer works for your family—an Illinois family law attorney can help you understand your options.
The family law attorneys at Law Offices of Tedone & Morton, P.C. assist families throughout Will County and the surrounding communities with divorce, parenting time, allocation of parental responsibilities, and other family law matters.
If you have questions about your parenting plan or believe your current arrangement may need to be changed, contact our office at 815-666-1285 to discuss your circumstances.
